Peace, Comedy Workshop Achieved
The official end of the prank war came this morning after everyone had had a chance to shower and otherwise recover from the final fracas. The original plan was to hold the treaty ceremony/mixer for members of the involved councils at the Baths, but they're still being aired out.
As a gesture toward a more cooperative future, Entertainment and Arts councils have decided to team up to promote the art form of stand-up, which requires both writing and performance.
One stipulation of the treaty is that any products of the workshop must be a proper set of jokes and humorous anecdotes and will not be biographies, dramatic readings or anything that might fall under the heading of a "one-person show." Agreement on this point was unanimous, a sign that there is much on which these formerly feuding factions already agree.
Labor Lists Least-Liked Jobs
The top five worst work details have been determined by the most scientific of methods, opinion polling, and we present them now in ascending order because it makes it more suspenseful. Most of them, you will notice, are low-cert jobs a lot of us have done; the average person might find the idea of digging around in people's mouths unpleasant, but if you've taken the time to be certified as a dentist, you probably don't mind it.
Labor is still in the very earliest stages of gathering information, so if you disagree with any of these picks or believe strongly that something else should've made the list, let them know. Without further ado:
5. Bioremediation. Particularly active bioremediation, where we deliberately introduce high concentrations of microbes, enzymes etc. to break down materials. It's essentially the process of digestion in the open air, and about as pleasant.
4. Super-smeller. Diagnostic hyperosmia, if you want to get technical. While we all appreciate neighbors of the human and canine persuasions training to sniff out diseases, manufacturing defects, etc., they're not usually called on to smell something pleasant, and that stinks.
3. Hoof trimming. This is always at least a bit of a dirty job, and when the animals are experiencing digital dermatitis or other causes of lameness, it makes it less pleasant for them and us.
2. Mediation and arbitration. While we don't often find ourselves in truly intractable disagreements, when we do, stakes and emotions are high, and being the one to help people sort through such difficult situations is stressful.
1.Abbatoir. Although we strive to treat animals in our community with respect, caring for them and appreciating the things they give us, it is nevertheless true that we also kill them, not as many as some towns, but more than others, and the killing and processing of animals is a difficult and unpleasant bunch of tasks.
Again, this list is intended to be the beginning of the conversation, not the end, so please reach out to labor@harmony to share your thoughts.
Public Apologies
Max Tegmar would like to apologize to anyone who may have been exposed to one of the many glitter bombs he planted throughout town. He did not fully appreciate the permanence of glitter.
Rynda Fineman would like to apologize to Della Kitt on behalf of her ferrets, Lady and Bandit. You do get used to the smell eventually.